vocaloidressing | (no subject)

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(no subject)

Well, well, well.

Were you all going to celebrate Valentine's without me?

[But he's so much better-looking than the other Lens.]

...actually, let's go with storks. Okay. So.

When a man and a woman love each other, usually, not always, but anyway -- [and launches into the typical tirade about babies and storks and whatnot]

[but this one is so mooooe]

[listens intently, until-- hey, wait a second here]

...You um, are talking about 'sex', aren't you?

[Two seconds away from facepalming.]

...yes. Yes, I am.

Ooh.

Um, I already have seen a lot of sex, it's not that interesting.

Yeah, but watching it is a completely different experience from -- didn't you say you were a month old?

[nods] Month or uh, a little over a year. It's... hard to tell.

Um, sorry for saying so, Len-san, but... ah... some of what you talked about didn't look like what I saw at all.

[And the fact that this Len has seen any of that at all at a year old is weighing heavily on whatever remains of his morality code.]

Ah.

Well.

I suppose it depends on... what you watched...

[~~WHY AM I HAVING THIS CONVERSATION~~]

[score?]

[hardly listening as he's now listing things off, counting them on his fingers]

Um, I mean... only two people? It's ah-- usually at least five. And you didn't say anything about goats, horses, or dogs. I'm pretty sure um, tentacles should be involved at some point. I mean, from what I remember. Those were a little scary... No one going to the bathroom or getting sick is also a little... You made it sound like it was 'adults' doing the sex thing and both wanted to do it. And um...

[he could go on like this all day]

[JUST DEAD SILENCE]

...uh.

...Huh?

That, uh.

That is not normal sexual intercourse, thank you very much.

[genuinely suprised]

It... it isn't?

I prefer being a little classier about it, but no, it's not.

Those are... interesting fetishes... who raised you, exactly?

Um, no one.

Master didn't even know I was 'alive'.

I do hope you mean "Master" as in, uh...

Uh... he owned the computer I was installed, ah, on. What do you think--

[pauses, remembers the plot of Erotic Dungeon Keeper 1-4

...With me?

Ew.

Okay, then. That's good. For a second I thought I might have a crisis on my hands.

And I'm still a little too young to be worrying about that kind of thing.

[still kind of grossed out here]

With... with me.

[shudder]

I never want to do any of that sex stuff.

[Well, more for him then.]

Yeah, that's more normal for a kid. [bit of an approving nod]

[looking a little torn]

'Kid'?

Um, normal is good...

Don't think too much about it.

Just... have fun with your life.

I wi-- am!

Good.

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